Are you thinking of eloping and not sure if it’s right for you?
After Hadley was born I shifted the gear of my business entirely. I decided that if I was going to take time away from my family and love what I’m doing for the next 10, 20 and even 30 years down the road, I needed to photograph like-minded couples. That meant simple, laid back people that enjoyed smaller gatherings. It doesn’t mean that I only shoot small weddings. I still photograph a few larger celebrations every year with like-minded couples that have large families, just no bridezillas. You know what I mean?
Ryan (my husband) and I know first hand what it’s like to plan a large wedding. Which is precisely why we decided to go another route. Initially when we started planning the list grew and was well on it’s way to 300 guests. We had just bought house and knew it would need work. Our budget wasn’t big to begin with and thought ‘how the hell are we going to do this without going into debt?’ We came to the conclusion that we were losing the meaning of the day and it was time to simplify. So we opted for an intimate wedding (14 people) in the ADK mountains. It was US! It was exactly the celebration we hoped for. In a generation where eloping and smaller weddings are becoming more popular. Why does it still seem so taboo? There is still meaning behind it. They still require a budget and planning. It is what you make it and 10/10 times it’s still freaking beautiful!! So I love when I come across couples that open up their heart and are willing to share their experience so other couples can do the same.
So how does this all come together? How do you make potentially enormous list and dwindle it down to nobody? And were their any downfalls? I interviewed Christy and Mark about their Cooperstown elopement. It was simple, sweet and romantic. My husband played the guitar for their first dance and we celebrated with champagne and a phone call to mom!! You can view their elopement HERE.
* SIDE NOTE: I chose to not alter these responses in any way. I left them raw and unfiltered, because let’s be real. Wedding planning can be hard! *
WHAT MADE YOU DECIDE TO ELOPE?
We decided to elope for a few reasons. I am a feeler and if something starts to feel stressful I ask myself what and why so with that being said…the thought of planning a wedding, even one with a select few guests, just invoked stress in me. I didn’t want to invite one person then hurt another and how do you determine who to include or not to include. In the big picture of things if we went that route those that matter would have understood so I wouldn’t say that was the main reason.
For me marriage is intimate, it’s special, it doesn’t have to be witnessed by 200 people to make it any more real or special. The ability to have it photographed and be able to share that after with the special people “includes” them. For us to write our own vows, be in a spot that was special to us and have the ability to feel like we were the only two people in the world was the most important thing.
It was also fun to know it was happening when others didn’t. It gave such a romantic feel between us.
We also didn’t want to wait, we knew we wanted to get married and saw no need to wait!
The overall dynamic of it was incredible. To have someone I trust in the background capturing every feeling we felt and a person that we look up to and respect put his passion into being the person to marry us was just hands down best day of our life.
We were a bit undecided but had in our mind exactly what we wanted it to look like. We wanted a few key details, private, water, soft lit sun, relaxed. The location we had discovered a year to the date prior on a spontaneous trip to Cooperstown , which is where the date came from.
DID YOU FIND ANY DISADVANTAGES TO ELOPING?
Our parents and maybe friends were a little let down to not be there but in the end they understood and respected what was important to us.
WHAT WERE THE BIGGEST ADVANTAGES TO HAVING A SMALL WEDDING?
We did not start our marriage in a 15-20k debt nor did we put that on our family.
It was private, it had meaning. We were able to feel completely relaxed and be ourself. It was not about pleasing anyone other than the two of us.
WHAT WOULD YOU TELL COUPLES THAT ARE CONSIDERING ELOPING BUT ARE UNSURE?
Don’t worry about what others think. If it’s what you want then that’s the way it should be.
DO IT ! It was by far hands down and every other describing word that says yes yes yes the best decision we could have made. The focus was on our vows and the meaning behind why we were there. Not on the flowers, dj, favors, chair covers. We weren’t worried about who aunt sally is sitting with. If kids weren’t on the invite. The DO NOT play list for the dj. My parents hate each other. Should we get a limo bus or have unlimited bar etc etc. We are happily married and I wouldn’t change a single detail of that day.
ANY OTHER THOUGHTS?
You are amazing. If someone wants the passion, emotion and rawness to be captured you are the girl!!! Your husbands pretty awesome too for officiating. The both of you put your heart into what you did and it showed.
OH! And the less planning the better. I have never been so cool, calm and collected really about anything so major as this and I was on this day. ❤️
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